Tron: Ares

So here's the thing. Against my better judgment, I went to see Tron: Ares. Why? Well, I've been having some ups and downs with my mental health lately, and needed to do something decadent and fun. I needed movie candy. And full disclosure, I wanted a very specific experience with this movie.

Some movies are good for basically one thing: getting super baked and rocking with the vibes more than the story or filmmaking. With that in mind, I went to see the new Tron yesterday and brought a big fat joint to smoke behind the theater beforehand. And guess what? I had a fuckin' blast.

Was it a good movie? Absolutely, unequivocally no. Was it Madam Web bad? Nah. It really wasn't. It wasn't Suicide Squad bad or even Morbius bad. It was just not good. Not as a movie. However, as a collection of trippy and interesting vignettes, it was great.

When I was a teenager, we had this VHS tape of early computer-animated shorts. It was just a collection a weird, trippy shit that happened to go along great with marijuana.

I'd put on that, or The Wall, or Heavy Metal, or any of several great Ralph Bakshi movies (American Pop comes to mind), and I would sit back and soak it in.

That's what I did yesterday, and it was fun as hell.

Basically, what Tron: Ares is, is a two-hour Nine Inch Nails music video by way of Tron. That's what I wanted, and that's what I got. There were definitely points in the movie where I acknowledged to myself that what I was watching was objectively ridiculous and bad. It stars noted (alleged) sex pest and (confirmed) shithead Jared Leto as 3D printed video-game Jesus, and it's full of weird, vague religious symbolism and motifs that go nowhere and say nothing of value. Also, unlike the other Tron movies, it takes place mainly in the real world, which was a bit of a drag sometimes, but it still managed to keep the visuals interesting enough for me to stay engaged.

How many stars would I give this movie? I'd say 2.5. It would only get 2, if I were judging it on the merit of the storytelling and filmmaking choices, but the visuals and music kicked it up a half a star. I don't know who directed it, and I don't really care. It doesn't matter. What matters is that I had a good time, and I'll probably never watch it again.

I'll sure as hell listen to that soundtrack though.

PS
For the record, as much as I would like to see more trippy, visually interesting movies, I'm not disappointed that this movie is tanking. It should tank. Studios need to learn to stop putting Jared Leto in stuff.

PPS
I saw the trailer for the new Avatar movie, and while I will probably not see that movie, it's hard for me to argue against it when I sat through this turd and had a good time. Maybe it's okay to chillax and watch something mindless and inconsequential. Maybe that's just fine.